Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Laugh your lungs out from W&G!


Jack: So, I've decided to take my career in a whole new direction.
Will: Forward?

Will: So now you're skipping work all together?!
Grace: No, I called in sick.
Will: Called who? You're the boss.
Grace: I know it was a strange conversation. If I do it again, I'm going to fire me.

Grace: Just FYI - The first 3 letters in assistant spell ass, so please, get off yours.

Karen: You know CPR?
Jack: Oh, yeah. I had to do it on my father when I told him I was gay... Only I think it just confused him even more.

Will: In this house, a queen beats a straight every time.

Jack: I'd like to sing a duet, with a man who's been such a huge inspiration to me... (picture of himself appears)

Jack: There are no straight men, only men who haven't met Jack.

Jack (after seeing Karen's closet): Oh, my God. If my closet were like this, I never would have come out of it!

Jack: It's time to put the sex back in homosexual.

Grace: Oh, how can I explain this? Guilt is an emotion...Wait, I'm getting ahead of myself...An emotion is...
Karen: Honey I know what guilt is! It's one of those touchy-feely words that doesn't really mean anything, like "maternal".... or "addiction".

Karen: I have a right mind to throw this drink in your face! (then proceeds to finish the drink)

Jack: Do you remember the name of my ex-boyfriend? You know, the blond one with the tattoos?
Karen: Oh, come on, honey, that's like trying to find a needle in a gaystack.

Karen: They're trying to make gay people straight? Good lord, don't they know what that'll do to the fall line?

Karen: You're comin' in loud and queer!

Grace: Jack, inviting three hot guys over to your apartment for a "fourgy" does not qualify as group therapy.

Grace: Jack, inviting three hot guys over to your apartment for a "fourgy" does not qualify as group therapy.

Jack: Sex is a drug. I should know; I'm a licensed dealer.

Karen: Oh, honey, everything I say about you behind your back is true.

(about Karen's driver)
Grace: Fire him.
Karen: He is old and sweet and helpless. I can't just fire him because he's a raging incompetent. I mean, maybe you could, but not me.
Grace: Karen, if that were true, we wouldn't be having this conversation.

Jack: (to Will) You know, anger doesn't really go with what you're wearing. But then again, not much does.

Jack: Will, have you totally forgotten how to speak our language? "Running late" is gay for "I'm blowing you off".
Will: Really? What's gay for "Get out"?
Jack: That would be "Good morning".
Will & Jack : Good morning Jack.

Mom: What if they want to come back for a little touchie-nookie-nicky?
Grace: Mom, can I take you to my therapist? Because he thinks I'm making you up.

Rosario: Lady, I used to teach children in my country.
Karen: Well, in this country, you wash my bra!

Grace to Karen (about the Hydra bra): Karen, I just want you to know that I really loved it that you stood besides me and showed me the way!
Karen (raising a toast): Darlin' welcome to my world!

2 comments:

Nirav said...

Brilliant!
You know....I've alaways loved these!
But now am more into SATC ones...they are simply fabulous!
Try 'em out....

Unknown said...

I always wanted these quotes @ one place :D